Butterflies in the stomach...kiss off diabetes

Vijay Sarup
08 October 2003

Mumbai: The urge to opt out was building from the time I was 48; it became very strong around 50. Something within me seemed to be getting destroyed by the pressures within the organisation. I was no longer enjoying my work (mostly I did). I was afraid of things going wrong (I usually took risks). I did not feel that I was contributing to the organisation (loyalty was nothing to be shy about then). I suspect there is a fundamental change when you turn 50.

Every organisation has its own problems, but this feeling is something within a person — it creeps in around this age. There is a famous psychologist who has a theory on this feeling — check out Erik Erikson. In any case, while theories may be reassuring, there is precious little you can do about the butterflies in your stomach when you want to opt out.

Butterfly — money

The scariest thing about this decision was, of course, money. We do not want to do something 'heroic' and be miserable later. After lots of discussions my wife and I zeroed in on this statement:

• We must earn variable cost every month (you guessed it — I am an accountant; variable cost is monthly expenditure not including big stuff like car, home theatre…) This means you lower your expectations substantially.
  
• We shall not touch our capital for any venture — however tempting. The nest egg built over 30 years should be subject to near-zero risk. It would be our ultimate backup.
  

We also recognised that we must earn for the thief who would knock at your door every month — the thief of inflation.

Too much thinking about money can paralyse you — too little thinking about it can make you fall flat when you opt out.